Return to site

It's Not Your Job to Change Someone

By Adi Andreeva

August 22, 2023

The living and the dead coexist in vivid color in the fantastic tableaus of artist Lauren Marx.

IT'S NOT YOUR JOB TO "WAKE UP" AND CHANGE ANYONE BUT YOURSELF

You don't have to make people see what they are not yet ready and unable to see for themselves.

Inner work is personal responsibility and connection to your higher self.

The way is to trust what your body is telling you through the symptoms it exhibits, to set your emotional and psychological boundaries, out of love for yourself and others, and to honor the sacred Truth that is stored in the Divine Universal Laws.

Know that everyone has their own path that they have come to walk alone, so try to always bring your focus back to your own Conscious Growth.

You can't save anyone but yourself, no matter how much you want to.

When we want to "wake people up" or help them see the Truth, we must be aware that until they take the step themselves to ask and invite us to look with them at what their unmet needs and concerns are, it is not the time for their change.

When we want to "wake" someone up, we basically want to change them in some way, and that is completely impossible, because you know how much effort and work it takes to do it with yourself, let alone succeed with others.

Let's give each other more love, understanding, approval, recognition and be the best possible version of ourselves, because when we are a worthy example, others will follow us and change themselves. We don't need someone to change in order to truly love them or to love ourselves and be happy. We believe that when one relationship doesn't work, we need to help the other change to see how things could be different.

It seems to us that only if this happened, only then could we be happy, but in fact it is not so. When we value and love ourselves, then the other always reflects us and "gives" us the same - Love.

We all walk our own paths at our own speed, live in our own timeline and level of Consciousness. We do not choose the time and place for the other person's healing, only they can do that.

We can choose for ourselves what we allow to happen to us and what we don't.

We have to choose and set our boundaries, stand behind what we do best and deserve accordingly.

We need to be confident all the time that we are worthy and deserve to meet our needs for connection, intimacy, love, abundance…

Sometimes we have to communicate with people at a distance because we don't yet feel ready to show up in the relationship in a way that would work for both of us at this point. Sometimes we have to let people go from our lives to be alone and in that moment we use to connect Emotionally with ourselves.

EQ: Emotional Intelligence.

A lonely person is one who has completely lost the emotional connection with himself and accordingly loses it with others, everything in his life falls apart, his partners only have their names changed, and everything else remains the same.

Let us strive to free ourselves from condemnation and to learn to accept people as they are, to love them as they are, where they are, and to embody love, compassion and goodwill in our relationships, without control or demands at any cost. On the other hand, this does not at all mean turning into emotional doormats and soul waste bins.

It is always important to seek balance in ourselves and in our relationships with others, with clearly defined boundaries that do not limit, but give value, freedom and inner happiness…

Only you can feel whether or not your relationship with yourself and others is fulfilling and one in which you can grow.

Choose one in which you feel truly yourself, you don't have to play a role, it will give you strength to go up together in one direction. Anything else is a waste of valuable time, both for you and for the other person.

Trust your body's wisdom, pay close attention to its signals, and seek out supportive spirit guides who resonate with you and you and you alone feel like they can help you connect with the ultimate teacher within yourself.

How to check your own growth every day?

Ask yourself these 3 simple questions:

1. What good did I do today?

2. What useful new thing did I learn today?

3. What can I be grateful for today?

 

Shared with joy

A.A

Stob, Bulgaria